I love this story from the excellent Chatsworth: The House by Deborah Devonshire (a book delightfully full of its author's personality):
"Plum-coloured plush covers a pair of enormous wing chairs constructed for men on the same scale which flank the fireplace [in the Chatsworth library - see above]. Two big fellows - the Eighth Duke and the then Prime Minister, Lord Salisbury - sat in them one evening about a hundred years ago. The latter looked up at the gallery running round the room... 'How do you get up there?' Lord Salisbury asked. Long pause. 'Damned if I know,' replied his host."
The false books on the gallery door have titles thought up by Patrick Leigh-Fermor. They include "Sideways through Derbyshire" by Crabbe, "Gloucester in All Weathers" by Doctor Foster, "Jellies and Blancmanges" by Somerset, and "Venus Observed" by I. Sawyer.
Moving swiftly on - all those, like me, who have been helpless with hysterical laughter reading Counting my Chickens will be so pleased to know that a new volume of Deborah Devonshire's writings has just come out: Home to Roost has an introduction by Alan Bennett and is guaranteed to enchant and entertain. This is a must!